Matters of Faith

Tags

writing, veritas, The Watcher, faith, Just Joshing, aurora awards

The hardest thing to do in this life is believe.  This isn’t just about God (although that in itself is a blog post and a half) but faith is in everything you do and don’t do.

It takes guts to believe in anything.  The greatest irony in this world is that in order to go for something more than what you already have, whether that be a relationship, a career choice, or any other kind of goal you can imagine, it takes faith to begin it.

You have to believe that you can do it.   And that’s hard sometimes.  My goals are to write and make a living at doing my creative pursuits, whether it be writing, or podcasting or something else.

No matter what, there are times you are questioning what you are doing with your life.

I remember wanting to finish a comic book.  I had been working on it since I had been apprenticed in Taylor, AZ.  Circumstances had come to the point that my production had been ground to a halt.  I could not pay the artist I wanted to work for.  Rent was high for my wage, and it was a very, very slow crawl to save money.   And right when I was about to start being able to pay my artist to move forward, I was fired due to some very interesting circumstances.

I had to hitchhike to another city just to work, and make it on time as there is no buses out there, and this kept getting pushed back farther and farther away.  I wondered whether or not I’d ever leave Snowflake Arizona, let alone finish that comic book I was working on.

When I came back to Calgary I had to rebuild and recover for about a year.  Finally, I was able to finish the book.

Veritas is the book by the way.  Credit to my sister for taking this picture.

I always am impressed when someone finishes something with this kind of magnitude.  It took me so long to get so far on this book that every time I see anybody do something I appreciate the sacrifices it took to see that idea go to print.  It’s awesome.  Kudos to anyone who follows it through.

That was my goal and I did it.  There were times I thought I’d never do it.  I just kept on and on and on.  It was all I could do.  I did it, and I’m not ashamed to admit I cried.  I had wanted to do something, show something from that time and I could look at myself proudly.  I had seen this through.

At that point, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

Of course, after some time passed, I wanted more.  I wanted to get back into books.  My plan was to do poetry again.  I had this grand idea of publishing an ebook version of a new poetry collection and sell some at cons.

That plan went out the door immediately as this longer poetry pieces morphed into this entire story told in poem form.  I got an amazing illustrator, and we made something I’m very proud of this day.

One of my first customers bought the book, liked it and asked what the heck I was going to do with it and my plans.  When I told her my master plan she told me she was opening up a publishing house and wanted to publish my books.

So this became a thing.

I learned a very important lesson that I still apply to this day.  Nothing ever works out how you imagine it to.  There are ups and downs that just are never quite planned for.  But that sometimes leads to a greater truth, and that’s that sometimes things work out even better than you ever planned.

Even the podcast was an accident.  I had the opportunity to interview Robert J. Sawyer about three years ago for his book Quantum Night.  It was a random word from him that pointed me in the direction of the podcast.  I never thought about doing one, and decided ultimately to try.

Why not?

Which leads me to right now.  I never set out to do this for awards.  I love meeting people who do amazing things all the time.  This podcast has given me the opportunity to meet some incredible individuals.  Just to listen and talk to them about what they are trying to accomplish is inspiring.

Last week I had an email in my inbox I never expected to get doing the podcast.  The Aurora awards are given out from the Canadian Science Fiction and Fantasy Association (CSFFA) for work in excellence in science fiction and fantasy.

I was shocked that I was a finalist.  I never sent in a nomination for myself.  Someone else did and people agreed with them.

That, truly, is amazing to me.

Thank you all very much for this very cool honour.  I never thought I’d get an Aurora for this podcast.  I’m fine with it.  It is an honour to be nominated with people like Clare C. Marshall, S.M. Beiko, Mike Bryant, and Steve Swanson.  That’s a cool list of people to go against and root for.

Not to mention everyone else going into their own rewards.  Good luck to each and every one of you.

Which leads to my last point on faith.  You can’t be guaranteed of anything, but as often happens, when you work on something and put the dedication and time, somewhere along the way, you get others to believe in you too.  And that, truly is the most amazing thing of all. I’ve already won.  I mean sure, I would love to get that award, but this is something I never asked for, and to be able to get this chance…wow.  More than I could have hoped.

I already have a goal for next year however, and that’s to get an aurora for something I am writing.  Right this minute, it feels pretty good.

 

 

My Four Rules

Tags

doing the things, four rules, fulfillment, Podcasting, The Watcher

Last blog, I talked about not beating yourself.  A lot of people tend to defeat themselves before they begin.  Also in general, a lot of talk is about finding fulfillment.  I have the belief that these two things are connected.  I find simplicity is the key to dealing with both ends to this.  How not to defeat yourself, and what to do when you get there.

A little bit of clarification before I really get into this.  No, this is not a one hundred percent guarantee of things working out for you exactly as you want.  Also note the key word in all this;  I said simple.  Simple is NOT easy.   I don’t want to hear about how I make it sound.  I make it sound simple.   Easy is another story altogether.

Ready?

I’m happy with myself.  I didn’t get there overnight, and I’m still working on things.  This is as always an ongoing process.  That said, I’m content.   And I do it with four rules

1. Show up

This seems so easy right?  So obvious.  It’s certainly not glamorous, but it may be the most important rule of all.  This is the first step, and sometimes, the last.

Right place and right time is real key.  Opportunities come your way when you least expect them.  At the last When Words Collide, I had the opportunity to sit next to Mark Leslie and wanted to interview him.  I had already gathered a bunch of people and the timing wasn’t good.  On Sunday afternoon I found myself with an hour to spare and found Mark walking by.  After we exchanged pleasantries, I asked if he’d be up to an interview.  He agreed, and here’s our interview.

I didn’t do anything special to get this opportunity.  I was there.  And really, the sum of the rule.  If you are where you are supposed to be, you will find opportunities you never anticipated.   This was one very cool interview, and it wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t just shown up.

Rule #2:  Do Your Thing

This is the vaguest rule, because for each person here, your thing varies.  Some of us punch a clock, others box, others write, or draw or do music.  But whatever that thing is, do it.  Do it often, do it proud, but do it.

For me, that is either writing or podcasting.  Writing is my first love and still is.  I work on words all the time.  Even if its final form is unique from time to time, it all starts to me from the point of view of telling a story.  Podcasting to me, is another form of storytelling.  I get to talk to amazing people who do amazing things all the time and I hear pieces of their story.  One definitely ties to the other.

The best reason to do things is that actions cause reactions.  I submit a story, it is rejected or accepted and in the process opportunities arise.  My next next project is the result of a request from Colleen Anderson.  She wanted me to do an epic poem for her Lewis Caroll collection and the idea of an Alice story came to me.

I did it.  I submitted it.  It got rejected.  However, it led down the path to me kind of discovering that maybe I have more than a story, but a really cool game.  More on that as it develops, but yeah, I did a thing, things happened, which led to more things.

Momentum is a powerful lever.  It pushes you forward.  Objects in motion tend to keep moving.  So do all the things.

#3 Don’t Quit

This is the hardest rule I think.  Because there are no guarantees.  In Arizona there were times when I was really struggling.   I was hitchhiking to work, often arriving to it dead on arrival, I wasn’t eating enough, money was tight, and I wondered if I ever would leave that place.  Dying seemed tempting.

Dying at that point would have been easy.  Who doesn’t want the pain to stop?  Just to have a moment where you’re numb you know?  You don’t feel all the bumps and pains and bruises.  Where you can just forget.

I kept going.  Because I didn’t want to stay there in that place.  I had things to do, goals to accomplish.  People I wanted to see again.  I wanted a chance to do it right this time, and not end up like this again.  So I kept going and fighting and in time I got out and moved forward.

No matter how bad it seems in the moment, remember that it’s just a moment.  Moments pass.  Look at what you’re fighting for.  A wise man once told me that the secret is never to look too closely at the shit you have to walk through.  A person that focuses on the obstacles in front of them never defeats them.

The person who focuses on the goal, gets the goal.

All that time I wanted to finish that comic.  I wanted to achieve something while I was there.  It took a lot longer than I thought it would, but I did it.

#4 The Rest is Rain

Life never works out quite the way you plan it.  I know people in my life that hate the idea of plans, and I see their point sometimes.  Why set up expectations?  Plans never work out the way you foresee them.

They don’t.  So why do them then?

Direction, focus, expectations are important.  You need hope, you need faith, and you need a tangible summit of the mountain you set to climb.  You’re no longer at the whims of just fate.  You are exercising your will in the eye of the storm.

Sometimes it works out even better than you imagine.

I had this plan once I was back on my feet to start working towards another poetry collection.  I had published a collection called “I Am..” a long, long time ago.  I wanted to start again, a similar way.

This time i wanted to do a longer poem.  So this vision of a boy in a watchtower surrounded by dragons below him came to me.  So I started writing, adding my frustrations to having a day job in front of me coming.  Next thing I know I tell a nice tale with chapter one called “The Watcher” in front of me.  I really liked it, and yet, I felt like there was more to the story.

So I wrote what happened next.  And then, what happened next.  I just kept wondering what would happen.

Somewhere along the way, I realized that this was my poetry collection.  I was telling a story and wanted it finished, just to see how it would go.

I finished it, and hired an amazing illustrator named Florence Chan to do some illustrations.  Once it was done, I had just planned to do an ebook.  I did one on Smashwords and it was bought by someone I interviewed a long time ago.  Justine Dowsett came to me after reading it and asked me what I wanted to do with it.  When I revealed my cunning plan, she offered to publish it.

The rest is history.

Now don’t get me wrong, things don’t always go this well.  Sometimes you fail on an epic scale.  Mistakes are going to happen, and you are going to fall from time to time.

But doors always open.

So those are my four rules.  Now, how do you ask how do they make you more at peace?

The answer is that they teach you more about you.  Most of what I’ve discovered about myself has involved me taking action, taking chances, and being willing to see things through.  By developing expectations, and goals and being unafraid to fail, I have done and learned so much.  I never would have realized what I was capable of if I hadn’t tried.

Success definitely helps, but so has my failures.  I’ve learned what is possible, what is real, what I can do, what I’m willing to do.  If I hadn’t went for it, if I hadn’t tried, I’d have wondered and held back.

This is not something I learned overnight.   Many trials have come and gone for me to get this far.  And it’s still a struggle.  It always is.   A big secret to seeking happiness is to go for big things.  To care about the result, and going for things that seem bigger than you imagine.  We are not meant to be small.  Writing this, I realize that there is still a lot I need to work on.  I’m not satisfied, even if I am happy with what I’ve done.  I still got a lot to do.

Inner peace doesn’t come just meditation and reflection.  It requires action.  It requires self expectations and it requires taking chances on you.  Only then do you really learn who you are.  Fulfillment comes from doing, not just watching, and waiting and drifting.

I am Thou

Tags

good enough, Podcasting, realism, self help, writing

I read a great little blog about the paradox of motivation by Colleen Doran and feel you should check out her patreon page. Colleen is a gifted illustrator and I am eager to see her finish A Distant Soil someday. So a quick thank you to her before we begin.

So a fair warning: this may initially come across like a self help article. It’s not. But it will start that way.

Ready?

I’ve been called an idealist my whole life. Many friends have called my aspirations unrealistic, even if they are rooting for me. Still, some of them have expressed the idea of me becoming what I want to become as an artist as unrealistic.

I have issues with the word realistic. This goes back to my school days. Hell, it goes even with teachers and writers. Teachers told me that I should have realistic goals. Even writers tell me that I shouldn’t set my hopes and dreams on being the writer I wanted to be. Not everyone can be Robert Jordan or Issac Asimov or Ray Bradbury.

I ignored that.  I was and am still convinced I was headed to bigger and better things.  I’ve had the world open up to me in strange ways.  I was an apprentice to a writer I looked up to, I’ve met and been blessed to chat with some of the most wonderful, engaging, endearing people I’ve been privileged to chat with.  They have made me better just being in their proximity.

I haven’t hit the heights I wanted to (more on that down below) but I’ve had a lot of amazing things happen chasing my dreams.  I’ve seen and gone down roads others don’t always want to.

When I came back to Calgary, that realism word had its ugly head come back.  I had a number of friends tell me the same line over and over again. “You can have anything you want and be anything you want. What a load of crap.”

The number of people who have told me this above quote is staggering. They forgot one key part of the quote though. The unspoken part. Ready?

“…if you’re good enough.”

It’s never said, but it’s always there. You can make a million dollars IF you have a degree. You can get that dream job IF you don’t have a criminal record. You can own that Mercedes Benz IF…

If.

What is good enough?  Is it the number of degrees you have?  Is it the pay check you take home at the end of the week?  Is it some other tangible that can be quantified in some way, shape or form?

I have thought long and hard about this, and concluded that there is nothing I can do to measure this thing called goodness.   Good is relative.  Good is whatever you wish it to be.  You could be good, IF you believe yourself to be.

This is one of my favorite quotes.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

But there is a flip side.  Success isn’t guaranteed.  Period.  Even if you believe in yourself, even if you do the right things, make all the right decisions, there is not one sure way to insure that you will get what you worked for.  Nothing is certain in this life.  No matter what kind of self help or belief you have, there is always a chance that things will not work out and that you will never see the results you are hoping for.

Yet, without that belief in yourself, you have no shot of achieving anything.  That’s the paradox.   You only have a certainty in failing.  It’s the easiest thing in the world to do.  All you have to do is believe you will not achieve it.

You won’t.   I promise.

But on the flip side, you may not get success anyway.  Or at the very least, the success you are craving.  I know that writing wise, hell, people may not ever buy my books.  Artists never have it easy.  As talented and magical and wondrous the worlds inside each and every one of us are, it is not always appreciated.  We live in a world that would rather exploit such things than reward them.   It’s easy to question your own worth in a world that doesn’t always seem to recognize it.

You can’t control the result.  That’s just the way it is.  It will rain if God wills it.   There is no control.  If you’re suffering through sickness, poverty, famine, it’s not your fault.  There may be things you are doing to exacerbate it, but ending up in bad situations isn’t anything more than a moment in time.   Blaming yourself for it isn’t the answer.

We don’t always get what we want, but we always get what we need.    Last month I hosted my second ever live podcast.  In it, my sister interviewed me.  After showing off her prowess with her art skills by beating me in a drawing contest blindfolded, I then ended up sounding like a goldfish.  Yet not a ton of people were there.  In fact it was the same number of people that were there for the cyclone podcast.  I did all I knew how to do to get people to come there.  I made mistakes, as people did not quite know what a live podcast was and what it had to do with a book.   That all said, I put a lot of time, effort and energy, not to mention cake into it.

I didn’t get the crowd, but I do have another chance.  I have two more live podcasts in the year to come.  One in June, and another in August.  And who knows for the future?  I’m not opposed to doing more.  Making them profitable is the next challenge there. That said, they are a hoot to do.

I didn’t get what I wanted, but doors opened anyway.  That’s not a bad thing.

Looking at the self help stuff out there, from Napolean Hill to Tony Robbins, I can see why a lot of people see it as garbage.  Just because they made themselves, doesn’t mean you are going to.  But if they say that, than what’s the appeal of self help.  I mean, if you’re going to fail anyway, why bother, right?

I think what self help actually is is life coaching.  Self help doesn’t guarantee success.  But there is a process to learning how to not beat yourself.  Teams that play seasons in their sports have the chance to teach themselves behaviors.  If they practice good habits, and maintain chemistry and unity, even though they lose games, they win far more often.  Self help is like that with people.   There may be no guarantees on the final result, but there are ways to insure you don’t cheat yourself from the opportunities in front of you.

That’s the real secret I think.  Everyone loses at some point.  The Yankees lose, our gigs don’t go the way we plan them to go.  You name it.  Things happen.  You can be consistent the whole way through and do the things you know how to do.  You can keep an open mind to the possibilities of what can be done.  Finally, take advantage of the opportunities that come your way.   Because they show up when you least expect them too.  Why not you right?

That’s the hard work.  Hope is hard.  Hope comes with pain.  Disappointments are harder to deal with.  You care more, want more, and go out to do more.

In order to even have a chance with success, you have to be willing to take chances, make mistakes and fail.  That is not an easy path.

The question you must ask yourself is do you believe you are good enough?  Are you willing to bet on yourself, even though it may not work out anyway?

Are you good enough?

 

How I made Adults Read Fox In Socks – My WWC Report

Tags

fox in socks, Interviews, panels, presentations, vanessa cardui, when words collide

This is a powerful book.  This book has the power to make adults kids again.  It makes informative sessions fun, AND it makes for ideas for the future.

Let’s talk about When Words Collide.  This was my first show where I would be active in doing presentations and panels.  I was nervous about that, in a good way.  Truthfully there isn’t much that I worry about that can happen on the stage.  That all said, I love it when I feel those butterflies.  It shows I care and want to do the best I can.

My podcast panel was ridiculously fun.  I got the crowd to read from Fox in Socks.  There was even a winner of the contest!  I got to talk about podcasting and got a really good crowd – better than I expected – and we managed to engage in a very fun presentation.  It was the highlight of my weekend.

My night with Fox in Socks didn’t end there.  My association with this book germinated from a impromptu fox in socks off with Vanessa Cardui while she mastered Just Joshing Episode 100.  Thinking that I was using it and that I was going to be part of the open mic anyway, I thought I’d challenge her to a fox in socks off, and she answered, throwing down the pirate hat in response.

Vanessa won the contest, but that’s beside the point.  I had a blast and it was a lot of fun to do.  Next year I hope to do something similar to that again.

Friday didn’t just include my presentation.  It also included my panel with goodreads.  Mark Leslie, M. Jane Collette, Beverly Ackerley and someone whose name escapes me had a great back and forth and the crowd was engaged.  It made me re-evaluate my use of the system and you’ll probably be seeing my own profile on Goodreads raise.  I learned a lot and managed to contribute a lot.

Saturday I had my other panel with video games, in which I thought that I had a good angle and focus, and found myself probably the most ill-prepared.  It was a good discussion and great games like Double Dragon, Okami, Dragon Age and more were discussed and construction of games in general was brought up.  I was bringing up Thea van Diepen’s forthcoming twine game as well.  At some point next year, I’ll have to play with some gaming software.

I started doing podcast interviews Saturday as well. I managed to interview Patricia Flewelling, Suzi Vadori, Vanessa Cardui, and JM Landels on Saturday for the podcast.  They were all amazing conversations.

I attended the banquet and functioned the role of phone camera man, taking pictures for various friends for the 1920s themed gala.  It was a fun dinner.  I bailed at the autograph session as I take that opportunity to usually just catch my breath.  That night I attended a variety of parties and had a good time until it was time to head back.

Sunday I started and finished with some great conversations with Gerald Brandt, Hayden Trenholm, Mark Leslie, Nola Sarina and Jo-Anne Morcum.  Hayden was the only one I feel that got kind of short changed.  We had a great conversation but it was cut short due to factors beyond our control.

I did my last presentation on Sunday too, in which I talked about loglines.  It wasn’t as good as my podcast panel.  I needed a little more interactivity for the whole thing, and for next year if I do it again, I will have a battleplan to get the audience involved.  I heard some amazing loglines at the end of the session however.  So I like to think I did some good.

After that I spent a couple of hours at the dead dog party, in which authors gather and say hi before we go off.  At that point, we’re all kind of on fumes and kind of just going through some motions.  That said, I met quite a few amazing people and I’m still working on a few projects post con.

The biggest thing I learned?  People are starting to become aware of me, even if I’m not being met by them.  It was a strange and wonderful experience to be greeted by strangers who knew who I was.  I may not be rich and shameless, but fame is happening bit by bit.

I also learned a little bit more about my weaknesses as a presenter and will work to shore them up.  That said, I got grown men and women to read Fox in Socks.  If that’s not a victory in this life I don’t know what is.

I definitely want to thank each person I saw, met, or reconnected with again this year at When Words Collide.  I hope to see you all again next year.

Just Joshing 100

Tags

axel howerton, coffin hop press, Just Joshing, music, patience, podcasts, robert bose, vanessa cardui, writing

It’s been one hundred episodes.

One hundred.

Wow.

So before I talk about the episode, I want to begin with a thank you.  Thank you to each and every person who took the time to listen to any of the episodes I’ve produced in the past.  This episode is special for a number of reasons.  The first is that this is the hundredth episode (obviously) but the second reason is the story behind this.

This was my first live show.  The episode was recorded At Owl’s Nest Books in Calgary, Alberta Canada on Wednesday, May 24th, 2017.  Now if you are aware of the weather that day, you know I was a little worried about the day.  After I got my awesome cake, the trees bent, the rain fell, and we had hurricane winds out there.

There was a question of whether or not anyone would show up.  I had rum, I had cake, Axel had brought whiskey, and we waited.  Fortunately, people showed and the show went on.

I opened up the show with a little bit of a monologue.  Heck, you only get to one hundred once right?

This being a live show called for some live guests.

 

Robert Bose has yet to be on my live podcast offically, (that will soon be amended).  That said, he’s someone that I’ve wanted to have on the show for while. Robert is a heck of a short story writer who has a ton of credits in quite a variety of publications.

Through Coffin Hop Press Robert is releasing his first short story collection, Fishing with the Devil.  I personally dig the fact that Robert wrote a short story based on the fact that his grandfather is the devil.  That’s a hell of a tagline and his reading really captured a sense of what to expect this July.

I look forward to seeing Robert again on the podcast, and really dug the glimpse I got into his collection.  This July, check this collection out.  I know I will.

 

 

 

My next guest has been on the show before and has his first Noirvella coming out this July.

Axel Howerton is probably one of the most talented writer/publisher/performers I’ve had the privilege to have on the show.  We continued some of our conversation from last time, and got into the history of Coffin Hop Press.  We both talk nicely about Sarah Johnson.

Then in my view, Axel just took it to the next level with his reading from his book.  He just killed it.  I really want this story.  Up until this podcast, I didn’t quite have a good idea of what noir was until Axel defined it.  Con Morte is a dark and vivid place that hits you hard the moment you hear him start reading from it.

This is damn good and also coming out this July. Axel and Robert are both going to be getting my hard earned dollars with their works and I’m encouraging you to do take a look at both of Robert’s and Axel’s stuff.

This July looks promising indeed.

 

Like I said at the event, I tried to design the live event like a talk show.  Now with a talk show you close the event one or two ways.  You either find someone funny, or you bring about someone with great musical talent.

I’ve had Vanessa Cardui before on the show as well.  I wanted her back for a number of reasons.  She’s one of my most popular guests ever, and she’s also fantastic live.  She’s an amazing musician well versed in a variety of instruments and Styles.

We talk about her album Patience which is going to be released September 7th, 2017.  We talk about the process this album took and one of the big reasons why this album took so long.

Also, she performed as musicians are known to do from time to time.  Vanessa performed a pirate song called Chapter 122, which is a direct reference to Moby Dick.  It’s an excellent song about rum which the whole group managed to sing to.

We talked about her chosen venue, and the odd coincidence/serendipity it ties to this image and much, much more.  Vanessa is one of my favorite guests and she delivered a fun interview and a great performance to close out the show.

Well, almost.  I closed out the show with a bit of my poetry book The Wandering God.  All in all it was a fun show I was happy to do it.

I promise this, at some point I will do another show like this again.  But this show was special for a lot of reasons.  It was my first live show, and it was one hundred.  But all the circumstances, the people – it was one heck of an experience.  I went outside my comfort zone, and was rewarded with something truly special.

Before I close with the link to the podcast, I want to make one small thank you to Vanessa.  She mastered the live episode for me.

And what would a live episode be like without a cool preview?

This is the cover from Tom Bagley for Coffin Hop’s Christmas anthology.

Coffin Hop Press.  : http://www.coffinhop.com

Vanessa Cardui: http://Vanessacardui.bandcamp.com

Listen here:  Just Joshing Episode 100

People that Inspire You – 200th Blog

Tags

blog 200, empathy, human condition, inspiration, Just Joshing, Podcasting, struggle, understanding

Before I begin, let’s do a little bit of fun.

My podcast has been on a roll of late, and the last few episodes should give you an idea as to why.

My last three episodes have been with Colleen Anderson, JM Dematteis and Saima Khalid.  Click a name to listen to their episode.  My show is approaching the 100th episode of being on the air and it’s been a thrill.  The show is Just Joshing and I hope you check it out.

Why do we struggle?

It’s an age old question and I don’t think there is an easy answer.  Struggle, pain, those things have been debated for ever and ever.   I’m not going to discuss where I believe struggle comes from or why it exists.   Instead, I’m going to point out people in my life, who face their own obstacles every day.

My dad is my hero.  It’s no secret to those that know me.  He came from an incredibly tough neighbourhood and overcame being a statistic and right now is helping people in Windsor Ontario with holistic medicine.   He is a genius at using food as medicine and does in a way anyone can learn to apply themselves.

My sister makes me smile.  She didn’t have the same kind of support I had with family, and yet is one of the kindest most decent people I know.  She’s gifted, smart, and maybe one of the sweetest people I know.  I’m her brother, and I know there’s a bias there, but I’m super proud to have her as a sister.

I have a friend who beat the odds living today.  He’s a chef and one of the sweetest dudes I know.  He’s a chef and he’s been there for me in ways I’ve enjoyed.  Sometimes i think he’s the devil in my life – others, he’s the wise man.  I am proud to know him.

I know this one person who sometimes feel she’s worthless.  Thoughts of how to proceed with her life tend to make her pause.  I can only offer kind words here and there.  I don’t pretend to fully comprehend the pressures she faces in the world we live in.  That said, she is smart, she has a hunger to learn.  She taught herself english.  She communicates incredibly well and understands well beyond some people I know here.  I think she’s amazing for having that kind of drive.

Another friend I know is about to become a mom.  She’s scared sometimes, because I know she worries about the kind of mom she’s going to be.  She’s dealt with a lot in her life, and may be the second toughest woman I know.   She’s going to be a great mom.

You can find inspiration with the people in your lives.  Those people who chase dreams and try to make them real.  Those who face unbearable obstacles and still persevere and strive to live.   Those who want more and show incredible ability to do so.  People truly tend to forget how amazing they really are.  I can use anyone in this example.

We all struggle.  We all have things to overcome and learn and deal with.   It can be depression, it can be abandonment, or loss, or knowledge and responsibilities.  It can be a question of purpose.  I may be describing you in there somewhere, or someone you know.   If you look hard enough, you can see those struggles and put yourself if not in people’s shoes completely, empathize.

So for you that face things head on, thank you for taking away my excuses.  Thank you for amazing me in what you do and how you do it.  Thanks for being inspiration in just being yourselves.

We all forget how great we are.  In how we stand, we can inspire others.  When we can see where people struggle, then the walls can come down and maybe, just maybe we can help heal each other.

For are all are in pain.

But we can all be healed.

Thanks for being here for 200 blogs.  Thanks for those who read and are inspired by what I write, and thank you for inspiring me to write.  This is only the beginning.

Ninety Percent of Your Battle

Tags

ninety percent, podcasts, success, The Cloud Diver, writing, youtube

Before we begin the blog, gotta say I’m really proud of two things.  The first is I have a youtube channel now.  Hooray right?  Right as I type this thirty some odd episodes are up there for you to listen to.  My channel is here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBr8pyMELcMcaHLd4qTWyaw

Watch and let me know what you think.

The other thing?  I got to talk to a comic book legend in JM Dematteis.  Been a big fan of his since his Silver Surfer run and have read a lot of his material since.

The episode is here. I also read a bit of The Cloud Diver at the end of episode.

Cool right?  On to the blog.

There is no guaranteed path to success.  I’m not saying that this will insure that you will always achieve your desired outcome.  Success and failure have no assurances.

I have a friend who has this cynical view of dreams coming true.  “You can be anything you want to be,” he says in that sarcastic tone.   There’s a tinge of sadness every time he says this.  A friend of mine I haven’t talked with for a long, long time finished the thought.

“..If you’re good enough.”

It’s a very unspoken part of the sentence.   Not many people say it, but a lot of people believe it.  That’s the problem.

I don’t know about you but that images pisses me off.

But we all feel this way sometimes.  Not good enough for that girl, that job, that career, whatever.  We beat ourselves most of the time when we think like that.  Our minds are powerful.  If we tell ourselves we can’t do something, we can’t do it.  With very few exceptions.

Thing is, can’t do it is in our heads a lot.  One of the most important lessons of my life involved my dad.  At eight years old, he took me to Fanshawe Park.  There we walked along the stream and then, for whatever reason, decided to scale the hill.   I was eight and little and small and looked at this hill with dread.  To be honest, I didn’t want to do it.

Dad scaled the thing with ease, which meant I had to try.  The first time, I fell…well, more like skidded down the hill.  I really didn’t want to climb the thing again.  Dad encouraged me.  I on the other hand, discouraged myself.

“I can’t do it.” I said to myself.  I kept climbing, saying that mantra over and over again.  To my surprise, somehow I found myself on the top of the hill.

This is one of my most important lessons.  Can’t is a concept.  Worth is a concept.  Deserving is also a concept.  Life is inherently unfair and that isn’t exactly a bad thing.

That hill taught me that I can do anything and that confidence carries me into situations sometimes I had no idea what exactly I am doing.  (My career can be described in jumping into situations I had no idea what I was doing, but whatever.)

But there are no guarantees.  Success and failure are possible outcomes.   That said, ninety percent of all your battles are just one thing, and that’s this:  If you want something and you want the best chance to succeed at getting it, show up and take action.

It sounds simple.   In essence that’s what you do when you go to work, that’s what you do when you go on a date, that’s what you do when you choose to do anything.  Show up and do something.  There are no guarantees after that, but really, that’s ninety percent of the work with anything.

Don’t let those negative thoughts beat you.   Just do the above paragraph.  Show up and deal with the task in front of you.  Every task in life is just those two things.   You are big enough, brave enough, smart enough,  and capable of doing anything if you just do those two things.

Show up, and do the work.  And don’t let any voice in your head tell you that you can’t do it.  Don’t sabotage yourself.  Because, why not you?

Just Joshing Episode 47: Clare C. Marshall

Tags

Clare C Marshall, Faery Ink Press, freelancing, Just Joshing, podcasts, writing

I’m back.   With everything that hit me, it’s been quite a while since I did a Just Joshing guest on the blog, but that returns today with Clare Marshall.

I met Clare at When Words Collide a year ago.   We didn’t really get a chance to speak until I attended Craig Dilouie’s launch party for Children of God a few months back.  What impressed me about Clare was the fact that she is so driven and passionate about what she wants to do with her career.

Her writing is top notch.  I have only started to read the Violet Fox, but was pleasantly surprised to find the opening chapter to be very engaging.  Kiera is a modern day Robin Hood, doing what she can for the Freetor people, who are oppressed by the Marlenians.   Chapter one involves a prince, a brooch, and a lot action.   So far, I’m engaged.

Clare just recently appeared on my show and was nice enough to answer a couple of Questions for the blog.  Below are her responses.

What are you working on right this minute?

I’m working on the next book in the Sparkstone Saga, Hunger In Her Bones, trying to get it into production. I’m also working on the third book in my YA fantasy series, The Emerald Cloth. On the business side, I’m working on improving my freelance business website (cmarshallpublishing.com), and increasing the number of shows I do next year.

 If you can talk about it, what has been the most fun freelance job you’ve done to date?

Hmm, that’s a tough one. I suppose I try to find the fun in all my jobs, Mary Poppins style, otherwise I wouldn’t be very efficient with getting things done! Any website job where I have a lot of creative freedom in the design and implementation is fun, because there’s a lot of problem solving, and I can usually listen to audio books/podcasts while I do it.

Is there a medium of writing you’d like to do that you haven’t done yet?  If so, what?

Yes! I’m very interested in writing a visual novel – they’re a kind of game, popular in Japan, though there are small/individual developers making them in the Western world. It would be a big project, so probably will work away at it for the next few years. Just have to brush up on and improve my coding skills.

Anything you’d like to add?

You can find my list of shows and appearances at https://www.faeryinkpress.com/about/upcoming-events

To sign up for the Faery Ink Press newsletter, you can go here: https://www.faeryinkpress.com/newsletter

If you’re a creative type and you’re looking for website design or hosting, or editing, formatting, or eBook creation, please contact me here: http://editinganddesign.com/contact-us/

Thanks Clare!

The only real other thing I have to add is that you can find her on twitter at @claremarshall13 .  Say hi.  She is awesome and someone to model your own work ethic and habits doing.  The podcast is linked below.  Have a listen.

http://jpantalleresco.podomatic.com/entry/2016-08-22T09_36_33-07_00

Just Joshing Episode 35: Megan Hutchison

Tags

comics, Interviews, Just Joshing, magic, megan hutchinson, podcasts, rockstars

Finally catching up with the Just Joshings with Episode 35.

Megan Hutchison is probably the coolest artist in comics.   Now, it goes without saying that she is talented.  Her work on Will of the Wisp: Grim Grimeon is nothing short of amazing.  It’s how I met her actually.

She was at Calgary Comic con being cool with everyone she came by.  I enjoyed my conversation with her, and asked her back then if she’d be cool with an interview.  She said yes, and we departed with me owning one of the coolest looking graphic novels in comics.

Flash forward to now.   I have a podcast, and Megan is about to undertake the coolest comic ever in Rockstars with Joe Harris.   The podcast is below, but here’s a brief introduction to Megan with this short interview.

Joshua Pantalleresco:  What are you working on right now?

Megan Hutchison:  I am continuing my work on Rockstars which will hopefully keep me busy for a while. I’m putting together a project with a writer friend of mine who is also a TV director which should be super fun. I’m also writing 2 horror scripts for myself to draw. One is a big historical fiction horror and the other is smaller, witchery-haunting based script. I’m also baking a lot more these days and am hoping to put together an illustrated baking book in the next few years.

JP: So far, what is the most fun you’ve had illustrating one panel?

MH:  In Rockstars, Joe [Harris] wrote a panel consisting of a demon-human orgy. When I did the roughs, Joe asked me to make it more “demony” and with “more orgy” and it turned out to be really fun to draw. My mother would be embarrassed but my note to Joe whenever he turns over a script is calling for more demon-orgies.

JP: Do you believe in magic?  Why? 

MH:  Yes-ish. I love science and am scientifically grounded but there is SO much we don’t know. And especially with the advancements of technology, magic is just science and technology that we don’t mentally have a grasp of why it works a certain way. I also read Tarot cards which is not science based at all but is a really fun narrative if you believe in it. Reality can be so dark and daunting, which makes believing in “magic” that much more important.

JP: Anything you’d like to add?

MH: Whenever you’re in a bad place in your life, remember that somewhere in the universe there is a chihuahua in bubblewrap in an endless loop…forever…

http://giphy.com/gifs/follow-ruinedchildhood2-for-more-6Fr7FIFGYfl9S

Thanks Megan!

Megan’s comic Rockstars with Joe Harris will be debuting in December.  If you want to find out what Megan is up to check out her webpage at http://www.blackem-art.com.  Her instagram and twitter handles are @blackem_art and her facebook page is https://www.facebook.com/blackem.hutch.   I want to thank Megan for her time and just being awesome.

The podcast is here.  Listen to it now: http://jpantalleresco.podomatic.com/entry/2016-06-17T20_16_35-07_00

Just Joshing Episode 34: Michell Plested

Tags

evil alter ego press, Interviews, Just Joshing, michell plested, mik murdoch, podcasts

As I keep catching up, check out my latest Wrestling Column at Wrestling Glory Days right here.  Give it a read.  I’ll be right back before you know it.

Alright?  Alright.  Let’s get cracking.

I keep catching up on Just Joshing with Michell Plested.  Michell is a jack of all trades.  Publisher, writer extraordinaire, and a podcaster in his own right.  Michell has created a publisher called Evil Alter Ego Press.  The first books from the publisher is the Mik Murdoch Boy Superhero series.  Books 1 and 2 were previously released from the publisher, but the new one is being released at When Words Collide.

Michell is also a boy scout leader and an amazing storyteller.  I first encountered Michell at my own taste of local authors event.  He had the crowd in the palm of his hand, and his concept was nothing short of amazing.  I wanted him on the podcast and he graciously agreed.

Of course, then I blew it on the first try.  I had a great conversation with him and my phone somehow deleted it.  Michell was gracious enough to let me have a conversation with him again, and it aired last week on the just joshing podcast.

Below is a brief interview.

Joshua Pantalleresco: What are you working on right this minute?

Michell Plested:  I am getting Mik Murdoch: Crisis of Conscience ready for the printer. That
and writing Scouts of the Apocalypse: Zombie War.

JP: For those people who are not aware, who or what is Evil Alter Ego press?

MP:  Evil Alter Ego Press (EAEP) is an independent publisher that focuses on
Young Adult books. EAEP isn’t overly fussy about the genre – just good
books that will delight readers.

JP:  Considering your apparent love of comics, have you ever thought of doing graphic novels?  It just seems like something you’d do.

MP:  I would actually really like to do a graphic novel. The problem is, I
don’t know any artists who are desperate to partner with me on one (at
least not yet) and my artistic skills are not up to snuff. I AM working on
a children’s book with a very talented artist though it doesn’t quite
qualify as a graphic novel.

JP:  Anything you’d like to add?

MP:  I grew up reading everything I could lay my hands on, including comics. My
parents and grandparents always gave me a hard time about the comic books
because they weren’t real books. I’m here to tell you, they and anyone
else who says comic books (and now graphic novel) don’t count as books are
dead wrong.

I couldn’t agree more.  By the way, I’m still jealous of Michell’s shirt.

I had a lot more I can say, but Michell sent me his bio, and I think I can close out the article with him.   you can find him on twitter at @mplested and his website is http://www.michellplested.com.  You can also find him on facebook at https://www.facebook.com/michell.plested.   I want to thank Michell for his time, and now, his bio to close things out.

 

Michell (Mike) Plested is an author, editor, blogger, closet superhero (not to mention sock herder and cat wrangler), podcaster and publisher living in Calgary, Alberta, Canada.

Mike is the co-founder of Evil Alter Ego Press. An indie press focused on outstanding Young Adult fiction.

His debut novel, Mik Murdoch, Boy Superhero was shortlisted for the Prix Aurora Award for Best YA Novel and its sequel, Mik Murdoch: The Power Within was launched at When Words Collide 2014. He has since released, Scouts of the Apocalypse: Zombie Plague (2015) and the co-written novel, Jack Kane & the Statue of Liberty (2015).

The podcast link is right below.  Enjoy.

http://jpantalleresco.podomatic.com/entry/2016-06-11T13_26_33-07_00